Struggles

The word of the day is Antitype: a noun meaning something that is foreshadowed by a type or symbol. As far as interesting words go, it is not altogether spectacular, but rather interesting just the same.

I know. I'm addicted to words. And books. and writing words, etc. But lately I've been going through a bit of a funk, shall we say. Maybe it's just that I've been marathoning through Gilmore Girls, maybe it's just that time of the semester. I really don't know, but whatever it is, I can't make the words flow. I can't make the stories come to mind like they used to.

I tried doing NaNoWriMo again this month. I got to about the 3rd day. Maybe it was my lack of motivation, inspiration or even the simple fact that I was nowhere close to making my words per day goal, but I gave up. Cowardly of me, I suppose, but I did it nonetheless.

I want to write and make money. And I know that is a crappy goal. A writer writes because they have to, and not because they will necessarily gain anything from it. I know that. And I want that. But right now, I feel stressed about monetary issues.

Maybe I just need to open up and forget about life and just write. The hard part is college is starting to be stressful, as the end of the semester is fast approaching.

I hate all these feelings and jumbled up half-thoughts that don't get completed. Maybe it is a lack of propriety. Maybe I just don't care anymore. That kind of scares me.

Anyway, word of the day, thoughts of the day. I decided I just need to start writing. Journaling. Blogging. Something, anything. And maybe the rest will follow.